Wednesday, August 31, 2011

GBE Wk 15: Longing

It helps me each day to believe that you're with me.
You're on the back of a yellow monarch's wings.
Or in the petals of yellow roses.
Or in the first whispers of Fall in the air.

Does it mean that my heart no longer aches when I think of my future without you in it?
Of course not.
Does it hurt me knowing you'll never meet the man who makes me so happy?
Or that I'll never watch you hold my newborn son?
Of course it does.

Sometimes the reality of your abscence hits me like it did the very first time and I cannot breathe.
I realize that no matter how much love and happiness I have in my life, there will always be a lonliness in my heart that can never be filled.

And the little life growing wild inside me, only brings me back to that realization even more these days.
I feel your presence and abscence all at the same time and it makes my heart and soul ache with confusion.


  1. Just beautiful. Great job and so sorry for the loss.

  2. Many of us have suffered the loss you are sharing here and have felt so much of what you describe. Very well done. *wiping a small tear*

  3. Oh wow! What a great poem! Made me all weepy.

  4. This is beautiful, and I felt exactly this way while I was carrying my babies. I missed my mom intensely during those months. Like you, I believed (and still do) that she is with my always, and that helps.

  5. "Sometimes the reality of your abscence hits me like it did the very first time and I cannot breathe"

    I have felt this way about a few men that were in my life. Very dead-on for me.

  6. Wow--this moved me deeply. I just can feel this at certain times in my life as well.

    Cheers, Jenn

  7. This is beautiful. I feel the presence of my parents each day. I know they are with me. Some days I miss them more than others. Those are the days when I long for their guidance or company. Still they are with me always. I loved this!