Monday, November 30, 2009

My Sweet, Painful Addiction

Monday evening, I'm waiting on James and a hot steaming bag of Suji's, the only food I will dain to let pass my lips at this moment. I'm obviously cranky, undeniably irritable and I want to smoke a cigarette more than I want to take my next breath.
But my next breath comes and goes and many follow after it and still no cigarettes. I swear to god, this quitting thing is going to kill me quicker than the cigarettes would have.
James took Persephone with him for the walk, which is helpful because the bitch doesn't listen to me when James isn't around. I have the deepest urge to copy the word 'nicotine' over and over again, because it is all I can think of. I thought taking the time to write in my blog would take my mind off of it somewhat, but it only illuminates my pain and frustration and reminds me of the countless blogs I've written before while chain smoking reds one after the other.
SO I started watching Coraline for the hundreth time, I'm at the scene with the jumping circus mice and it has to be the coolest scene created in claymation. Actually, it isn't 'claymation' anymore, they call it something else but I can't remember what that something else is. Oh well. Memory loss must be another nicotine withdrawl.
I'll quit boring you with my addiction.

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